But …you’re a girl..

Ayn Rand quote

I don’t remember the first time I heard these words.. (usually followed by – “You should/shouldn’t/can/can’t”). Conveyed mostly with self-righteous zeal, often with a smug tone, a smidgeon of ‘concern’ and always always unsolicited. “You’re a girl” has been suffixed with many a gem of patriarchal wisdom and, of course, “Indian culture”. J

Some absolute winners I (and girls I know) have heard over the years:

  • You’re a girl.. you should know how to cook
  • You’re a girl, you can’t use ‘bad words’
  • You’re a girl, don’t argue with (obnoxious) elders
  • You’re a girl, no sleepovers for you (said a dad to his 21-year-old daughter)
  • You’re a girl, why are your parents spending so much on your education?
  • You’re a girl, you smoke/drink? I thought you’re “decent” (said the guy on his second drink)
  • You’re a girl, are you allowed to wear skirts or dresses?
  • You’re a girl, of course you need not do the karwa chauth, just ask if your in-laws are ok with it
  • You’re a girl.. brilliant career or fulfilling family –pick one
  • You’re a girl.. I don’t care if you have exams tomorrow, get started on dinner
  • You’re the girl, why’re you making your husband do the dishes?
  • You’re a girl.. here, let me explain this investment plan to your dad/husband

As corporates, HR departments and greeting card companies all over the world celebrate Women’s Day this year, various platitudes will be composed to pay homage to “the strength of a woman”. Resolutions will be taken to honour, protect and respect her.

All I ask is, please, for f&*k’s sake, STOP SAYING “You’re a girl”. I will not do/say things BECAUSE I am a girl. But just because I AM .

4 thoughts on “But …you’re a girl..

    • Priya says:

      Well said, that’s what I follow these days.. But, a life time of people (even family and close friends) indulging in such nonsense makes you want to throw a brick at someone at times. 🙂

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